Representing Yourself with Power
by Kim Ades
In Real Estate, ‘Representation’ usually refers to the responsibility of speaking or acting on behalf of someone else.
You take the role of representing your clients very seriously and make it your business to go the distance for them– listing properties at the best price, making strategic offers, and reviewing contracts, terms and conditions with diligence and precision… all in their best interests.
Not only do you represent your clients with focus and attention, you do everything you can to guarantee your clients are well attended to personally and professionally. You stay up into the early hours of the morning until the deal is complete, provide your clients with drinks and meals, and drive them all over the city in your squeaky-clean car. 24 hours, 7 days a week and whatever it takes in order to ultimately bring them satisfaction and piece of mind.
No doubt successful real estate professionals excel at the art of representing others. The question is, how well do they represent themselves?
As a coach, it is not uncommon for me to work with super-high achievers who are extraordinarily talented and successful in their field of work, but still struggle in key areas of their lives. They may have conflict with a challenging co-worker or senior executive. They may have a tense relationship at home, an overwhelming financial load to carry, or a deep dark secret that they are terrified to reveal. They may have a health problem or an unsafe level of stress. No matter what the cause, the common theme that is frequently uncovered is a struggle with self-representation.
What happens is that brilliant and driven individuals fall into a habit of contortion in an effort to try to look good, do good deeds, please others, and hide whatever they feel most shameful about. It’s easy for them to stand up for others, but really struggle to represent themselves powerfully. They often find themselves in situations where they feel forced to sacrifice their time, their health, and their values in order to experience validation and approval from the world around them. They lose their sense of self in the name of victory and the achievement of goals.
One of the most notable characteristics of many of these high-achievers is that they are also intelligent, and come to realize that the primary cause of all their struggles is their frame of mind. As a result they make it their mission to seek help in addressing this repetitive and destructive behavioral pattern.
Here are 3 basic principles I teach my clients in order to help them create a sense of greater personal control and inner peace:
1 – Control only what you can – your THINKING and your EMOTIONS. Let go of everything else that you have been trying to control. Increase the responsibility you have for yourself and reduce the responsibility you have been taking for everyone else. When something goes wrong, refuse to look for someone to blame,. Instead, search for solutions, and bounce back quickly,
2 – What you focus on grows –this means that you must find a way to focus on what’s good and right about others in order to extract the best from them. Don’t get distracted by their flaws – this is far too time consuming and energy-draining. Spend this energy in a better way by looking for the best qualities of those people around you – your buyers, your sellers, your colleagues, and even the agents on the other side of the deal.
3 – Your thinking will determine what you can achieve – therefore it’s up to you to make a conscious effort to choose thoughts that will propel you to success. I teach people who want to reach extraordinary goals about the power of thought mastery and use the process of journaling to help them achieve extraordinary results. Start journaling today so that you can begin to see your thoughts on paper and CHOOSE how you will think about any subject.
As a reader of Broker★Agent Advisor we’d like to invite you to take our Frame of Mind Assessment, which includes one complimentary follow up coaching call.